Adopted: The Movie

I haven't had much to write about lately. Our paperwork is still being reviewed in Albany. Once our social worker gets it back we will schedule our last meeting and the dossier will be sent to the adoption agency and homeland security for approval. Once approved it will be sent to China.


Today my hubby and I went to a special screening of "Adopted:The Movie" a film by Barb Lee. It was amazingly powerful and thought provoking. Defintely not for the faint of heart, it explores the reality of adopting children of different races. Children searching for identities and personal heritage in addition to relating to their adopted families. They should make viewing this film madatory for anyone who is adopting a child.

http://www.adoptedthemovie.com/adopted-trailer/


Make sure you have tissues handy. A big part of the movie centers on a young Korean-American woman adopted when she was an infant 32 years ago. Her parents and brother are white. She was raised in the pacific northwest. All her parents had to do were file for adoption and pick her up at the airport. They did not research her culture or background. They just wanted a daughter. Her story details the internal and external struggles many adoptees and their families deal with. There is something always missing and it's not dealt with. It's truly a heartbreaking story but a story that must be told.

Chinese Word of the Day

解决
jiějué
/ to settle (a dispute) / resolve / to resolve / to solve

I resolve to post more regularly to my blog ;)

Career Change

For as long as I can remember I have wanted to be an English teacher. Over the years I achieved my B.A. in English and an MBA. With the recent turn in the economy and the serious possibility of becoming a parent, I figured it was now or never. I started my first class in education last week. It's entitled "Youth Literacy" and in the class we explore books about adolescence and books adolescences read. I can not express how much I love this class. My interest in this class is so intense the 2 hours I spend there feels like it flies by. I wish I could stay longer but the professor and other students leave and I would be alone in the dark. OK maybe I'd leave the light on. Seriously, I feel in my heart that this is my calling. To realize I will achieve this after so many years brings me great joy and a sense of triumph. I will never be rich but I will make a difference. How cool is that ?

I went to look up the Chinese word of the day and found this :

办学
bànxué
/ to run a school /

Coincidence ? I think not.....Life is good

The Waiting Game

I can't believe it's been so long since I have written. There's nothing too new to report. We are still waiting for confirmation and clearance from Albany on our background checks. It's only been about 4 weeks or so and the wait time is about 6 to 8 weeks so I guess I am being impatient. We will have one more meeting with our social worker. I am disappointed in one of my oldest and dearest friends. I asked her to write a letter on our behalf to give to our social worker in the huge information packet. Yes, it's one of those letters I wrote about earlier. Please put into writing that we are good people and worthy to be parents. I asked her because we have known each other for 12 years, she was a bridesmaid at my wedding, she works in the childcare field, she is well educated and not only do I value her opinion- I love her. We have been through a lot together. She is an amazing person. I spoke to her before Christmas- she had lots of questions for us. Almost like an interview of sorts. She said she had experience in writing such letters- she gave another friend a referral letter for a Chinese adoption.

I have sent her several emails and and left her a few voicemails- we usually play tag a bit before we actually speak most times. She knows how important this is to my husband and I. We just don't understand why she hasn't sent the letter. I gave her a deadline and explained our schedule with the social worker. Did she change her mind and not deem us worthy ? I am kind of hurt to be honest. I am trying to deal with this tactfully but I am a bit pissed. Guess this is just another speed bump on our road to China. Afterall, this is the Year of the Ox which means a year ahead of hard work, fortitude and patience.

Chinese Word of the Day

部位

bùwèi
/ position / place /

Chinese Word of the Day

草案

caoàn

"/ draft (legislation, proposal, etc.) /"

The Paper Trail Continues.....

We finally received the fingerprint cards from the local adoption agency a few days before Christmas Eve. We dutifully went off to get them completed at police headquarters. The officer handling our fingerprints remarked “Oh it seems you have done this before” as she pressed my fingers one by one into ink and onto the card. I laughed and told her no this was my first fingerprinting session but I do watch Law and Order. She was not amused. My husband sighed and rolled his eyes. Now don’t ask me why, but we only brought two of the fingerprint cards with us to be completed. The agency sent us four.We figured they sent us extras. We received four cards and no instructions. Nice. When we came home, my husband went trolling around the internet and found the requirements for the cards. You guessed it. We needed two each. The Chinese proverb “Raise your sail one foot and you get ten feet of wind” comes to mind. I should have raised my sail and asked for clarification on the cards. A few days later, we had to find the time to get away from work, go back, and get the others completed. Another lesson learned. Tonight we finally finished the application, which included the following:


1. Two personal statements from each of us explaining why we want to be parents
2. A copy of our last income tax statement
3. Our individual W2 forms because hey, the income tax statement wasn’t enough
4. A picture of the two of us together
5. Four fingerprint cards
6. Payment for seven hundred dollars because someone has to actually read and all this information even though we are not adopting through this agency they are getting paid to submit our fingerprint cards for a background check.
7. Personal details about our parents and siblings-not just names and addresses but marital status, number of children and what they do for a living.
8. Consent forms to allow them to use our story and/or personal pictures on their website (we said no thank you to that one).


I understand the importance of screening potential parents but some of the stuff they ask is borderline silly. Why do they need to know where my sister works? How does that play into my adoption qualifications? I don’t know. I am not a child psychologist or adoption specialist but some of this stuff seems so bizarre. Regardless, we filled in the form with all of the necessary information. I drove down to the 24-hour post office in the freezing rain to mail it out. I almost slipped walking to my car on the icy driveway. For a split second, I thought “OMG I can’t go out in this! Then I thought but I must do this for my child! The weather will be even worse tomorrow and that might mean it could be another two days before it gets mailed.” I got in the car and laughed. I don’t even know this kid yet. She might not even be BORN and she has me driving out into the freezing rain. The mere thought and hope of the possibility I have a child out there somewhere has turned me into a determined protective mama bear of sorts. I wonder if this happens with other adoptive moms.

The Chinese New Year starts on January 26, 2009. It will be the year of the Ox. According to a few websites I was reading, this year is a conservative year-one of traditions and values. It will be a slow but steady year. We will see stability, growth, and diligence will pay off. The year of the Ox is a year of harvest. We will reap what we have sown. I can only pray what we have sown is sufficient.