Who knew Social Workers had a sense of humor ?

Yesterday my hubby and I had our first meeting with a social worker who will determine if we and our home are suitable for adopting a child. The interview was three (3) hours long. She asked us everything: we had to give details of our lives as children- what our parents were like, how we were disciplined, what holidays we celebrated and our memories of life in general. I forgot a lot about my life in highschool. I was in fact a straight A student, on the honor roll and graduated 53rd in a class of 600 with a regents diploma. I wrote for the school newspaper and was the music director for the highschool radio station. As I spoke all I could think is "how will this determine if I am a good parent?" It was weird reliving those memories.

When we got to the point where we discussed our relationship my husband teared up as he recalled our first meeting and first few dates. Yes we met online and yes I was the first girl he ever brought home to meet his family. Watching him speak to a total stranger about me and how I am the best thing to ever happen to him left me speechlees. He grabbed a tissue and wiped his eyes a few times as he spoke. When it was my turn to speak about us I did my usual tap dance with humor and made him and the social worker laugh. I told the story of how he worked in Manhattan and would drive to Long Island to take me out on Friday nights. After several weeks of this I started to offer to cook dinner for him and rent movies so the poor guy could save some money (LOL). One night before he left work he called me to give me a head's up that he was leaving and asked me if I needed anything. He said "You know; milk, bread, eggs. Do you need anything?" I politely said no and told him to drive carefully. After we hung up I called my aunt and told her about our conversation. "He's the one" I told her. I was that simple. Less than two years later we were married.

When the social worker completed our interview she did a tour of our house and we showed her which bedroom we would redecorate for our daughter. A daughter whom we have never met. A daughter whom might not yet be born. A stranger. As we stood in the bedroom looking at the closets and the windows I glanced at my husband: the man who completes me and makes life all the good things it should be. We were once strangers too.

Just the facts Ma'am...and get 'em notarized

The past few weeks I have had a terrible cold and haven't done too much of anything except work on the adoption dossier and home study requirements with my hubby. The paperwork involved is so incredibly tedious and everything has to be notarized. So far we have had our physicals with our doctors complete with bloodwork, schlepped to police headquarters for our 'good citizen' letters stating we are not criminals, made an appointment with the social worker for a home visit, requested employment verification letters from our respective employers and signed up for the required online home study courses. Phew. We still have to complete our application for the home study which by the way must be done through a local adoption agency because the one we are using is out of state.

Part of that application requires a brief statement as to why we want to adopt. My hubby and I have to write seperate statements on on desire to be parents. Oh, the pressure ! How exactly does one request to be a mom ? How do I convey the deepest feelings in my heart ? You know those feelings ....as soon as you type them and see the words in black and white your eyes well up with tears and a lump lodges squarely in your throat. To speak the words out loud is almost unfathomable. After much consideration over how to express myself I finally finished my letter and somehow read it aloud to my husband. He smiled and told me I did a good job. He has yet to complete his letter. Hopefully he will finish tonight so we can mail that portion out to the agency.
In the meantime I picked up a copy of the book "I Love You Like Crazy Cakes" and keep it on my nightstand. It's a children's book written by Rose Lewis and illustrated by Jane Dyer. It tels the story of Ms. Lewis' journey through the adoption of a little girl from China. It's a touching story and beautifully illustrated. I just hope that one day my husband and I will be reading that book to our own daughter.