This week my husband and I watched an documentary on Chinese adoption. "Wo Ai Ni (I love you) Mommy" is the story of an 8 year old Chinese girl who is adopted by a family on Long Island. The family has 2 biological sons and a 3 year old Chinese girl who was adopted when she was an infant. I have to admit I found the film unsettling, for many reasons. I realize that adoption is not easy, especially on a young child. Eight year old Fang Sui Yong speaks no English when she meets her new Mommy. Her new mom speaks very little Chinese. Thankfully the filmmaker is Chinese and does a lot of translating between the two. I don't know why, but the adopted mom in the film brings with her to China a bevvy of flash cards and starts trying to teach the poor kid English in their hotel room. This is a huge struggle for the child and ultimately brings her to tears. I am not sure if this was the right thing to do while they were still in China. the poor kid is completely overwhelmed and this just adds more stress to her already fragile state.
Throughout the film we see various struggles of this little girl trying to adapt to her new life. Ultimately she totally acclimates and forgets how to speak Chinese all together despite her parents enrolling her in a Chinese language program. We see her making new friends, going to glamour girl parties, and dancing at her older brother's Bar Mitzvah party. While I recognize these rites of passage it just seemed so plastic. Is this what life in America is all about? It just seemed so shallow to me. I guess we are all entitled to our opinion. This girl is undeniably loved by her new family. The documentary spans approximately the first 18 months of her new life in America. She has flourished into what appears to be a happy girl. I wonder what lies beneath the surface and what demons she will deal with when she gets older.
Showing posts with label Adoption News. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Adoption News. Show all posts
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Adoption News - Tragedy in Haiti
Eleven days ago Haiti suffered a massive earthquake. Before the quake hit there was an estimated 380,000 orphans in Haiti. There were some adoptive families in the U.S. and Europe already matched with children waiting for their paperwork to be finalized and visas issued. Thankfully the government expedited many of these adoptions so these children could be relocated to their new homes. The horror now is the fact that there are even more orphans due to this disaster. Haiti has halted all new adoption requests as authorities search desperately for biological family members for children who have lost their parents. Sadly, Haiti's infrastructure was not the best before the earthquake. It's even worse now. many orphanages were destroyed. The rebuilding process will be a long and arduous one for sure.
This tragedy made me reflect on my own adoption process. In May 2008 there was a massive earthquake in China. It registered 7.9 in the Sichuan Province. According to an article in the New York Times over 70,000 people were killed and 18,000 missing. Thousands of the quake's victims were children crushed in shoddily built schools, inciting protests by parents. Local police harassed the protesters and the government criticized them. At least one human right advocate who championed their cause was arrested.
The Chinese government refused to release the number of students who died or their names. But one official report soon after the earthquake estimated 10,000 students perished in the collapse of 7,000 classrooms and dormitory rooms. Reports also emerged in July of 2008 that local governments in the province had begun a coordinated campaign to buy the silence of angry parents whose children died in the earthquake.
Most parents of these victims took a payment of about $8,800 for their silence plus a guaranteed pension. In December the same year Chinese government officials acknowledged
in the most definitive report since the earthquake that many school buildings across the country are poorly constructed and that 20 percent of primary schools in one southwestern province may be unsafe.
These tragedies have struck a chord with me. I think about my life in the privileged suburbs of New York. I will never take my good fortune of being born in America for granted ever again.
This tragedy made me reflect on my own adoption process. In May 2008 there was a massive earthquake in China. It registered 7.9 in the Sichuan Province. According to an article in the New York Times over 70,000 people were killed and 18,000 missing. Thousands of the quake's victims were children crushed in shoddily built schools, inciting protests by parents. Local police harassed the protesters and the government criticized them. At least one human right advocate who championed their cause was arrested.
The Chinese government refused to release the number of students who died or their names. But one official report soon after the earthquake estimated 10,000 students perished in the collapse of 7,000 classrooms and dormitory rooms. Reports also emerged in July of 2008 that local governments in the province had begun a coordinated campaign to buy the silence of angry parents whose children died in the earthquake.
Most parents of these victims took a payment of about $8,800 for their silence plus a guaranteed pension. In December the same year Chinese government officials acknowledged
in the most definitive report since the earthquake that many school buildings across the country are poorly constructed and that 20 percent of primary schools in one southwestern province may be unsafe.
These tragedies have struck a chord with me. I think about my life in the privileged suburbs of New York. I will never take my good fortune of being born in America for granted ever again.
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